Women are biologically designed to handle high amounts of stress. A recent UCLA study shows that during stressful situations, oxytocin, or the “touch chemical,” is actually enhanced by estrogen. Thus, unlike men who adapt to the flight or flight reaction, women need emotional support during times of high stress.
So, where does PMS come into play with all of this?
The hormonal imbalance brought about by premenstrual syndrome enhances a woman’s stress level, increasing her need to cuddle, talk, and relax — the need for emotional support.
Sometimes, all you need to feel better is a bit of affection.
Sometimes, all you need to feel better is a bit of affection.
Of course, both a man and woman’s initial reaction during this sensitive time of month is fight or flight. We tend to stay as far away from each other as humanly possible as to avoid any lethal confrontation. However, this proves to cause more stress than healing.
As hormones surge and oxytocin levels rise, a woman instinctually desires to feel close to others to reassure that everything is going to be alright. When looking at emergency situations, women aptly grab the children and huddle in shelter, whereas men are more likely to yield a weapon and face the storm. Men don’t need the emotional support that women do at times of high stress.
Thus, next time you feel as though you’re ready to fly off the handle, call a friend for a cup of coffee and good conversation; send texts back and forth, write an email. You’ll be surprised how healing those small connections can be. (Great tip for all you emotional eaters whose hunger for random snacks skyrockets during this time of the month.)
When it comes to relationship stress during PMS, communicate with your man. We’re all quick to assume that he ‘knows’ when we’re suffering our time of month, but chances are, he’s not as in sync with your biological clock as you have lead yourself to believe. Don’t be afraid to ask for the emotional support you require at this time!
Get him there!
Men move toward isolation when they’re feeling stressed because testosterone represses that ‘get cozy’ feeling of oxytocin, causing them to seek ways out of the situation. Instead of avoiding each other, use this time to rekindle the flame.
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